Friday, November 27, 2009

On Training Children:
Some Personal Practical Thoughts

And you, fathers,
do not provoke your children to wrath,
but bring them up
in the training and admonition of the Lord.
(Ephesians 6:4 NKJV)

Psalms 127 (Starting Point)
3 Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD, The fruit of the womb is a reward.
4 Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, So are the children of one's youth.
5 Happy is the man who has his quiver full of them; They shall not be ashamed, But shall speak with their enemies in the gate.

Exodus 12 (Family Traditions)
26 And it shall be, when your children say to you, 'What do you mean by this service?'
27 that you shall say, 'It is the Passover sacrifice of the LORD, who passed over the houses of the children of Israel in Egypt when He struck the Egyptians and delivered our households.'

Joshua 4
6 That this may be a sign among you when your children ask in time to come, saying, 'What do these stones mean to you?'
7 Then you shall answer them that the waters of the Jordan were cut off before the ark of the covenant of the LORD; when it crossed over the Jordan, the waters of the Jordan were cut off. And these stones shall be for a memorial to the children of Israel forever.

Deuteronomy 6 (Constantly)
6 And these words which I command you today shall be in your heart.
7 You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up.
8 You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes.
9 You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.
… (Reasons)
20 When your son asks you in time to come, saying, 'What is the meaning of the testimonies, the statutes, and the judgments which the LORD our God has commanded you?'
21 then you shall say to your son: 'We were slaves of Pharaoh in Egypt, and the LORD brought us out of Egypt with a mighty hand

• What I have learned from the Bible and our attempts to apply it:

1. Parent must accept personal responsibility (mental)
2. Parent must emphasize taking charge personally of personal behavior, control what you can control (physical)
3. Parent must lead by example
4. Parent must show an interest in the children
5. Parent must show the children that you will always love them
6. Parent must talk with them, real conversation, talk with as adults (maturity)
7. Parent must act aggressively on teachable moments
8. Parent must cultivate an understanding of principles that underlie any specific rules
9. Parent must maintain high expectations, led by the parent’s own personal behavior
10. Parent must exude mercy and confidence, “You will get better”
11. Parent must explain reasons behind decisions
12. Parent must set the tone that, “We are different”
13. Parent must praise exceedingly more than punish
14. Parent must get caught (naturally) praying and reading Bible
15. Parent must never quit

4 comments:

David B. Ellis said...

For some reason my comment on the blog GLORY TO GOD is not appearing. Hopefully its merely a technical difficulty and not the Father Stephen restricting comments when a difficult theological problem has been raised.

Regardless, I will reply to your comment on the subject here if you don't mind (and if you do you're free and welcome to erase it if you do mind):

"While we do not suffer the guilt of Adam’s sin, we do suffer the physical consequences thereof: physical suffering and death."

If God created the universe and is omnipotent then the "physical consequences" of Adam's sin are whatever God chooses for them to be. Including whether there are any physical consequences to the rest of the world at all. Apologists frequently make comments like yours that treat this as if it were some natural system God is subject to rather than entirely his choice (as it must inevitably be if he is, in fact, omnipotent).

Why should a deer have to be burned to death in a forest fire because some human ate a piece of fruit?

"If there were no physical trials here, we would likely turn away from God, accepting this world as our heaven. "

A bizarre idea. Why would we turn away from a God who we know to have given us an environment equivalent to heaven? Having clear and abundant evidence of God's benevolence is hardly a reason to turn away from him.

"If God were selfish and uncaring, why did He (Jesus) die for our sins?"

Lets go back to my analogy of the doctor. Suppose he refrains from giving any of the sufferers the medicine and then flagellates himself as a demonstration of his willingness to participate in the victims suffering.

No reasonable person who find him, therefore, benevolent. We'd simply think him crazy. And I'm sure "God is insane" is not a theodicy you're wanting to embrace.

"Trials will turn those with a pure heart toward God, recognizing that He has provided that perfect place for us (heaven) if we freely choose to serve Him."

A rational person is not inspired to love another because that other inflicts grave suffering on them. Again, these facile attempts at theodicy only serve to show the magnitude of the problem.

John said...

I'm sticking with what I said at Stephen's. Adam and Eve turned away in Eden, and everything was good there.

dale said...

"Imagine feeling free from financial worry, free from debt, and free from the never-ending pressures of juggling all those financial demands. Imagine…feeling in control of your finances."

Money Matters: Financial Freedom for all God’s Children shows you how to do God's math, which is based on spiritual principles found in Scripture. God's math results in: . Debt-Free Living . Focus & Planning . A Disciplined Lifestyle . Easy Simplicity . Surrender & Trust . Creating versus Consuming . Stewardship Versus Ownership . Generosity "I have observed how the grip of materialism can strangle a person and an organization. The only cure is understanding and applying God’s principles of stewardship and generosity. Money DOES matter. Learn from Mike, one of the best teachers of our time, how to get in sync with God’s game plan."—Bob Buford, Founding Chairman, Leadership Network "Earn all you can, save all you can, and give all you can."—John Wesley "I have observed how the grip of materialism can strangle a person and an organization.

dale said...

"Imagine feeling free from financial worry, free from debt, and free from the never-ending pressures of juggling all those financial demands. Imagine…feeling in control of your finances."

Money Matters: Financial Freedom for all God’s Children shows you how to do God's math, which is based on spiritual principles found in Scripture. God's math results in: . Debt-Free Living . Focus & Planning . A Disciplined Lifestyle . Easy Simplicity . Surrender & Trust . Creating versus Consuming . Stewardship Versus Ownership . Generosity "I have observed how the grip of materialism can strangle a person and an organization. The only cure is understanding and applying God’s principles of stewardship and generosity. Money DOES matter. Learn from Mike, one of the best teachers of our time, how to get in sync with God’s game plan."—Bob Buford, Founding Chairman, Leadership Network "Earn all you can, save all you can, and give all you can."—John Wesley "I have observed how the grip of materialism can strangle a person and an organization.