Friday, November 27, 2009

On Training Children:
Some Personal Practical Thoughts

And you, fathers,
do not provoke your children to wrath,
but bring them up
in the training and admonition of the Lord.
(Ephesians 6:4 NKJV)

Psalms 127 (Starting Point)
3 Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD, The fruit of the womb is a reward.
4 Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, So are the children of one's youth.
5 Happy is the man who has his quiver full of them; They shall not be ashamed, But shall speak with their enemies in the gate.

Exodus 12 (Family Traditions)
26 And it shall be, when your children say to you, 'What do you mean by this service?'
27 that you shall say, 'It is the Passover sacrifice of the LORD, who passed over the houses of the children of Israel in Egypt when He struck the Egyptians and delivered our households.'

Joshua 4
6 That this may be a sign among you when your children ask in time to come, saying, 'What do these stones mean to you?'
7 Then you shall answer them that the waters of the Jordan were cut off before the ark of the covenant of the LORD; when it crossed over the Jordan, the waters of the Jordan were cut off. And these stones shall be for a memorial to the children of Israel forever.

Deuteronomy 6 (Constantly)
6 And these words which I command you today shall be in your heart.
7 You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up.
8 You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes.
9 You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.
… (Reasons)
20 When your son asks you in time to come, saying, 'What is the meaning of the testimonies, the statutes, and the judgments which the LORD our God has commanded you?'
21 then you shall say to your son: 'We were slaves of Pharaoh in Egypt, and the LORD brought us out of Egypt with a mighty hand

• What I have learned from the Bible and our attempts to apply it:

1. Parent must accept personal responsibility (mental)
2. Parent must emphasize taking charge personally of personal behavior, control what you can control (physical)
3. Parent must lead by example
4. Parent must show an interest in the children
5. Parent must show the children that you will always love them
6. Parent must talk with them, real conversation, talk with as adults (maturity)
7. Parent must act aggressively on teachable moments
8. Parent must cultivate an understanding of principles that underlie any specific rules
9. Parent must maintain high expectations, led by the parent’s own personal behavior
10. Parent must exude mercy and confidence, “You will get better”
11. Parent must explain reasons behind decisions
12. Parent must set the tone that, “We are different”
13. Parent must praise exceedingly more than punish
14. Parent must get caught (naturally) praying and reading Bible
15. Parent must never quit